Inspite of Things ;)

Despite that our semi-bad break up earlier this year, me and Justin do still get along really well. The one problem I have right now is that I think he girlfriend is using him. They both left Job Corps last month. Justin found a job, but Rosa hasn’t and pretty much doesn’t plan on it. She thinks its his job to support her, and I think that’s THE MOST RIDICOULOUS THING in the WHOLE WORLD. And it’s not like she couldn’t find a job, because she isn’t looking. If she was looking and just couldn’t find one then yes I would cut the girl some slack. But he’s one of my best friends and I don’t appriciate her using him.

-Sasha

Love the job :)

I can’t believe that I finally found one job the I LOVE.

I knew I would find one some day but can’t actually believe it’s now.

Birthday…

So I can offically say I turned 21 yesterday, and truthfully I still have no clue where life is going to take me. But I’ve given up on trying to figure it out and decided to just have fun.

Btw, love my new job. Little kids are so sweet.

–Sasha =)

Stressful Days =]

So I got a new job in August, working as a subsitute teacher so that I can hopefully start back full-time at college in January for Spring semester. Not to sure how things are going to work out though because jobs are hard to come by right now, and I’ve only been working at most three days a week, which isn’t going to make saving for tuiton any easier. I’ve thought of just riding out the last ten days til I turn 21 and then putting my application back in at a couple of places that said to come back after my birthday. At least that way I would have a more guartuneed paycheck. Anyways, I’m pretty sure that I can figure it out in the upcoming days. The last couple of days has been really stressful because my older sister Paula has had some heath problems and the hospital keeps sending her home without actually knowing what is wrong with her, it’s just getting annoying. Well not just annoying but its making us wonder why it seems like everyone in this town no longer cares about anything if it has to do with our family. I mean I know that we do have a lot of people in our family with health problems, and a lot of felons but it doesn’t make us any less of a person just because we have a  massive dysfuntion of family. I guess the last time I updated and said that maybe all the good stuff was just God’s way of making up in advance for bad horrible stuff to come was true. I was hoping that it wasn’t and that I was only trying to be modest and downplay a good life but I also know that this is the way life usual works for me at least. You get a week or two maybe a month of awesomeness and then two or three months of nothing but horrible stressfulness, it sucks but I guess that’s life.  Anyways, sorry again for not updating so long but with the new job and the current money situations, plus computer issues and family problems it’s been hard to find the time to get online to update this. I’ll try to update more often from now on.

- Sasha :]

Yay! For a new job & some major growing up, that I didn’t know I needed to do.

So, starting Aug. 12th  I will have a new job as a subsitute teacher for Ponca City Public Schools. And starting Aug 24th I will be taking night classes in Secondary Edu. at the local community college. So maybe I was wrong about a few things in the past year. Like me thinking I would have to go back to job corps to get my life back to where I wanted it. I didn’t but there’s a lot still missing that would make me have the perfect life. But I’m not striving for perfect, I just want happiness. It does seem kind of wierd to me though that just as I am figuring my life out career and education wise all of my friends are finding happily-ever after. It makes me feel kind of left out, because I don’t know if I will ever meet the right guy or not. But I guess I’ll meet him when I’m suppose to, because my mom is right about one thing for sure. You have to learn to love yourself for who you are before you can expect someone to love you. I’m finally at a place in my life where I love myself and wouldn’t change for someone, just because they promise me happiness and love. Because they either have to love me for who I am or not at all. This is why my best friend says I’ll never find true happiness, because I expect too much of the male species. But I don’t think so, I don’t think she gives them enough credit. Either that or she just hasn’t met a gueninly nice guy before. It’s wierd but it seems like I shoud have done most of my growing up before I turned 18. But it seems to me that most of the growing up I have done has been in the past 3 year between 18 and 21 with most of that being in the past year. My mom always told me that I would figure life out for myself one of these days but I don’t really think i have. I just think that a few things have started to make a whole lot more sense to me. Because there really are a lot of things I still don’t understand most of the things that happen or for that matter have happened in my life. But hey at least I am trying and I have gotten some where. Wish me luck of figuring out the rest of the stuff, because I’m pretty sure I’m gonna need it.

Sad part about all the growing up I have done in the last year is I didn’t even know I had done it until now, or for that matter that I even need to grow up some more.  Maybe life will start taking a turn for the better for me from now on. But who knows maybe all this good stuff that’s been happening is only to prepare me for something bad  horrible in the future. Let’s hope not.

- Sasha <3

Mass Dysfunction =)

I hate having a dysfunctional family. My brother’s insane girlfriend of 8 1/2 years. Well they were doing there usual thing which is having huge fights. Well she ran outside and started yelling some stuff about him hitting her (which he didn’t do) and their neighbors called the cops well my brother took off in the car and came here and asked my mom if she had any money for gas so he could get out of town. Well she gave him her last $20 and he took off. But he came back about 20 minutes later because there was a cop at every exit out of town. Well we went and talked to her and she wanted to talk to him. So we went and told him and everything and were headed back over there when we got to her house the cops pulled us over and ran mine and my mom’s driver’s licenses and our tags and everything but at the same time another cop was over at our house arresting my brother for domestic assalt and battery in the prescnece of a minor. This sucks because she blames it on the neighbors and it’s her fault. But what is worse is the cops already watch our house because they pretty much thing our family is nuts. Well my mom is seriously talking about just leaving town next month because it is just getting worse. Anyways that’s all I wanted to rant about. And I will keep you updated on my brother.

-Sasha <3

Michael Jackson?

So he died. I mean I understand feeling bad for his family, but unless you personally knew him I just don’t see the point. It irritates me that little kids go missing everyday and don’t get any kind of media attention and then some big celerity dies and everyone just has to know about it. How about you put the media attention on something that matters like global warming, the failing economy, missing kids. It’s not like talking about it is magically going to make him reappear. Did he really do anything except get away with molesting kids because he was rich. Its like the only thing that matters to people anymore is the stupid celebrity’s who make millions of dollars. Anyways, rant over.

- Sasha <3

Found Out.

So I found out from Charles, that Jon wasn’t found guilty in the traditional way. He plead out to 20 years so that he wouldn’t have to face a jury trial. Now, I told my mom about this on the way to church this morning and she tends to agree with me on the fact that why would someone agree to plead guilty to something and do that many years if they didn’t do anything wrong. Plus he has the same lawyer as my brother Donald did when he went up for escape charges and this particular lawyer refuses to lose and will talk his clients into pleading out so that he doesn’t have the lose on his record. Well I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have had him plead out if the D.A. didn’t have some kind of evidence to prove that he was guilty. It just kind of gets me thinking what kind of person is her really. Because the guy I thought I knew wouldn’t have done something like that to his little sister. It also makes me think that maybe I don’t really know my friends as well as I thought I did. Or maybe it really was just because I didn’t know Jon that well before he got arrested. I only had been there about a month and a half when he left and how well can you really know someone in that short amount of time. Anyways, that’s all for now.

-Sasha <3

O.M.G. What have I done?? =) =]

So I’m pretty sure that I did something very stupid that could quite possibly ruin on of the best friendships I have. I told one of my best guy friends Dave that I liked him as way more than just a friend. He hasn’t really said anything about that, but I’m not sure what he’s gonna tell me when he finally does say something. I just really hope and pray that it doesn’t ruin our friendship, because I don’t think I could handle that.Anyways, Caity called me last night but it was at like midnight and I was already asleep. Hopefully she will call me back and I can figure out what she wanted that late at night. Still haven’t heard from Justin so he must still be pretty mad at me for the whole showing my mom thing. And haven’t heard from Jeremy in a couple of weeks but then it could be because he’s really busy with school and work. It’s not like it’s the first time. Glad that Dustin is finally leaving me out of his and Christina’s drama. Anyways, update more later.

-Sasha <3

The Unexpected =) =]

So yesterday I was checking up on my friend Jon, who has been jail for the last two years since 6-26-07 for something everyone of his friends know he didn’t do. Well he went to court a couple of weeks ago but I had forgotten about it until yesterday well I searched for his court records like I had been for the last 6 or 7 months just to keep up with him and found out that he got sentenced on the 15th to 20 years. It definatly makes me hate the judical system of this country right now. Because how could he have done what they say he did if he was at job corps for a year and a half before he was arrested. I really do hope and pray that his lawyer appeals the decison because I hate to think of the fact that he could do that many years for something he wasn’t even around to do. Anyways, Caity was trying to call me all day yesterday and I kept missing the calls. She left me a message late last night after I was asleep telling me its really important. I just hope that Brad didn’t break up with her because I really can’t take another crying feast from her. I mean she’s my best friend and I hate to see her cry. Expecially over a guy. Anyways, I’m not sure what’s going on I guess I’ll figure that out when I call her back later after she gets off work. Other than that, my friend Justin hasn’t really talked to me much since he went to Job Corps but he’s not talking to me at all right now. Not since I was the person that made the discovery that his girlfriend is 5 weeks pregnant. I didn’t tell his dad and step-mom(aka my sister Rosie) but I showed my mom and she called my sister and showed it to her and I’m guessing that she showed his dad. But she also wrote him an e-mail asking why he didn’t just tell them all the truth in the first place. Anyways, that’s just about the only reason he could really be mad at me because I haven’t really talked to him much either. Anyways, this all happened last week sometime. I’m not sure if he’s coming home for summer break or not but if he does I can only imagine what he’ll have to say to me. It’s not like we haven’t been through a lot of stuff in the past years. I mean come on we’ve been friends since age 3, does he really think that I would do something to put are long running friendship in jeporady. Anyways, nothing else noteworthy happened yesterday. Suberbia just keeps getting boring-er and boring-er. Lol.

- Sasha =)